 The image to your right is from the cover of The Lovely Bones, a wonderful book you should take a look at. The picture was edited, however...by me! This is my artistic blog, as I affectionately call it. Whenever I'm mad or angry at the world I can just open this up and vent my feelings in story, song, poetry or prose. Nifty, huh? To give you the discreet low-down, my name is Maggie and I'm fourteen. I do well in school, but I could do better. I play sports like basketball and volleyball. The person you'll read about here won't reflect the "outer" me. We all put on a type of mask when outside, especially myself, but here in my room is when I'm most vulnerable and myself. I always restrain myself and my true feelings in front of everyone else, but you...you get a special one of a lifetime peek into me. My passion lies in art and writing. A lot of my friends don't know that, because it's a more personal part of my life which I don't like to flaunt. I'm not going to do any tests or surveys in here, that's for Diaryland. This is me. Not everything I'll post is mine. Sometimes I come across a quote or some lyrics that strike me, or are particularly meaningful. Enjoy. |  | ||
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4.29.2003
Back In Iraq 2.0 I feel useless. posted by maggie on 5:01:03 PM * * * * * 4.13.2003 Screw this god damn movie night. I still don't understand why I'm not invited to it. Every single one of my friends go, and then I'm forced to listen to them reminiscing about it, and I'm like, hello? I'm right here, being forced to listen to you talk about your fucking Commander Keen and whatever crap you watched that night. I'm so unpleasant. But I mean, it's not like I don't have fun by myself, right? I can watch movies...or sports, and then SNL is always on, and that's the only thing that seems to make me smile. Stupid. posted by maggie on 8:09:23 AM * * * * * 4.11.2003 You know what I love about the Beatles? How their songs are so simplistic, really, but they're still fantastic. Take a listen to '1' and the songs and lyrics are simple, but the songs have such meaning and depth. I love them. posted by maggie on 3:25:51 PM Why must we always contradict ourselves... I hate putting my opinion out there. It always seems to just get torn. posted by maggie on 3:22:49 PM * * * * * 4.4.2003 The other morning when I was walking in the school corridor, which was crowded with students, I don't know why but I suddenly felt...lost. I think I'm losing my connections with humanity. I get more and more disgusted everyday, did you know that? I felt like I didn't belong there at all. I've decided to start my regimen back up again. I've decided to make myself almost unattainable. I see these girls throwing themselves in the open and I think it's so stupid. I suppose my whole fettucini alfredo lunch won't do much for my regimen. I'll start tomorrow. Mother and I are going grocery shopping so I can pick out "good" foods, if there is such a thing. I wish I could hire a hypnotist to just make me detest food and anytime I touched it I would faint or something. My goal is 135. My BMI will be 19.4 as opposed to this disgusting and unacceptable 23.4 it is now. I'm going to be perfect, oh so perfect. I'll be satisfied. I suppose this will mark my return to the ana forums. I'm so damn excited right now I can't stop shaking. Too bad I'm out of laxatives, those used to be so comforting. Well, it wasn't comfortable waking up at 3 in the morning with the most terrible and painful cramps, but it was soothing in a way. GOODBYE. posted by maggie on 6:53:46 PM * * * * * 3.31.2003 I am so fucking sick and tired of her talking about her boyfriend constantly. Not only does that get me down about not having one, I'm sure it drags everyone else down. What is with these other students? They started going out with people in grade four. Excuse my beliefs but that just seems wrong. I was playing Pokemon and watching Sailor Moon in grade four, not making out with fellow classmates. Stupid. It's all stupid. The world is stupid, you are stupid, but most importantly, I am stupid. posted by maggie on 3:18:12 PM * * * * * 3.24.2003 Michael Moore was out of line. posted by maggie on 4:15:01 PM * * * * * 3.17.2003 I wish I could rewind a year back to when my mind was in that state of self-hatred, because it actually got me somewhere. All I do is eat now, what am I supposed to do? It's so hard to reverse your life back towards that time. But I've decided to go back, and you'll be my guide. posted by maggie on 6:30:33 PM She wakes up, Again. Eats breakfast, Too much. Showers, Too long. Puts on her jeans, Too tight. She cries, Too quiet to hear. posted by maggie on 6:28:25 PM Top ten songs that have changed my life, or reflect on it in some way: Tears for Fears - Mad World |